Humor, Life

8 Reasons Quitting Smoking is Harder Than Organic Chemistry

In all fairness, this has nothing to organic chemistry. I just had less trouble passing that devil class than I have in my various attempts at kicking this habit.

1. You replace the cigarette habit with other habits, which most often are worse than the original addiction.

No cigarettes? No problem! You’ll just buy four bags of chips, six chocolate bars, and two 20 ounce red bulls instead. Sugar free red bulls though, gotta watch your figure.

2. It’s almost impossible for a smoker to not smoke while drinking.

Drinks with the girls. Two jack and cokes in and you’re itching to step out and light up. Then your BFF Emily pulls a pack of camel menthol silvers out of her purse and starts packing them at the table, asking if anyone’s got a lighter. You’re done for.

3. Cigarettes in traffic.

The freeway is backed up for miles and your only instinct is to roll the window down, turn the music up, and smoke the stress away.

4. Cigarettes when you’re falling asleep while driving.

The windows down and music up just aren’t enough to keep you awake. You need that buzz. You resist the urge and next thing you know you’re swerving into the other lane.

5. All of your friends are smokers.

Who the hell do you sit with at the table in the restaurant when you’re out to dinner and every single person excuses themselves for a smoke? Haha you’re alone at BDubs, loser.

6. It’s easy to stop if you have a legit reason, but if you just want to stop cause it’s “healthier,” good fricken luck.

You’re knocked up? You’re sick as a dog? Your mom is in town and she doesn’t know you’re a friggin ashtray? No problem. Smoking just isn’t a thing. You want to quit because, you know, it’s healthy? Hahahahahaah. That’s amusing.

7. Somebody offers you one and you don’t want to be impolite.

You’re bestie needs a buddy to smoke, right? She can’t smoke alone. That’s like leaving her prone to attacks or something.

8. Cigarettes are your stress buster.

Everyone you work with is pissing you off, and you would normally go outside for a breather and a cigarette. Now what?

Screw this, give me a cigarette.


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